unsaid but hopefully well written

from pinterest

Nearing the time I told her, my mother urge me to get ready. She said it's possible for me to be late if I didn't get ready from that time. Although lazy, I know she was right. And long story short, I went out 1 hour before the said time and obviously, I was 15 minutes late.

Luckily (?) there's no one who had come except for 1 person.

My mother chat me afterward and the first thing she asked me was whether I was late. I told her, I was late. But I came second and no one came until like... 15 to 20 minutes later. She replied in serious manner that no matter what, the appointment is at 4 o'clock, I should not be late next time.

Later on, I told my mother that the event itself only start 1 or 1 and a half hour later. And it's kinda upsetting because no one who came later than me, seems to see this as a problem while I know I was rushing myself. I told her that sometimes, I had this urge to come on time just to be mean to those who come late. I hate that being on time means sparing my time, feeling less appreciated since that event won't start anyway and it doesn't motivate me to make being punctual a habit.

I hate that being late is normal.

Then my mother said that being punctual is never for other people, it's for myself. She told me that if my only reason to be on time is to pick on those who are late, it doesn't make me doing the right thing either. So what's the difference?

(Singing Ed Sheeran's : my dad was wrong 'cause I'm not like my mom, 'cause she'd just smile and I'm complaining in a song :/)

You know what, she was right as she always is.

That afternoon, she went out from my home 2 hour before her appointment time.

Anyway, I tried to be like her and went out 1 hour and 45 mins before my appointment time later on. When I was on my way, still close to my house, a friend texted me and asked whether I would come.

I told her, sure. I'm currently on my way.

She replied me, woow you're so on time. I will just go later.

Well, punctuality as normalcy is apparently not for everyone.

To be fair, that friend of mine came just several minutes after the appointment time so she wasn't planning on being late either. But my appointment still start 30 minutes after the said time. So I guess it's such a thing that is possible to change overtime :)

Cat Socrates!

... (insert 'what' sfx from Weighlifting Fairy Kim Bok Joo drama)

On the way from Boat Quay to Marina Bay

lucu yah :) kemudian nanjak -,-!

how I get my best walking record on SHealth

Except for that whole major skirt accident, my trip was totally satisfying. Well, I did wrongly assumed a walking distance from Boat Quay to Marina Bay Sands and Library @ Orchard to Plaza Singapura. I also took a bus to opposite direction when I was planning to go back from Tiong Bahru and got scammed by a man (and being told off by a middle aged woman afterwards).

But then again, I set another record of walking on my SHealth app ('this is your most active days') and found Jalan Rumah Tinggi on my way from Tiong Bahru thanks to both unfortunate events.

jalan rumah tinggi :)

After all, what is traveling without the kind of experience you could look back to and laugh at. I've been there, done that and gratefully regret nothing about that :)

jauh-jauh ke Singapur nemunya fotoinnya tulisan minang

Boat Quay

iLight 2017 at Marina Bay

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taken from here

Di awal minggu lalu, teman saya tiba-tiba ngechat via instagram, ngajakin saya untuk ikutan event-nya Hijup : Inspirasi Wanita vol.3 : "Berawal dari Hobi, Kreatif Jadi Produktif". Salah satu pembicaranya adalah Miranti Andi Kasim, co-founder-nya LivingLoving. Saya kebetulan lumayan sering baca blog itu dan suka banget ngeliatin setiap post nya yang bisa bikin even the smallest thing sounds super fun. Narasumber yang lain adalah Indah Nada Puspita, seorang fashion blogger yang saya udah pernah dengar namanya sebelumnya tapi belum pernah baca blog nya. Karena ini formatnya sharing session, saya jadi penasaran hal apa yang akan mereka bagi, terutama karena saya lagi pengen banyak nulis di blog dan lagi seneng-senengnya crafting lagi. Jadilah saya semangat banget untuk ikutan (plus event-nya gratis hehehe).

sharing session dari mbak Miranti from LivingLoving

Making Painted Necklace with LivingLoving (demo aja tapi, huhu nggak kebagian)

Source : [x]

Saya ini anaknya gampang terpengaruh. Gampaaaang sekali. Like the easiest thing to do to me is to influence me (aside from making me happy, that's also easy).

Mau beli buku, liat review di Goodreads dan ada yang ngasih rating 1 plus review ini itu, saya langsung naro balik bukunya ke rak.

Suka banget sama Cheese in the Trap, gara-gara sekeliling saya banyakan yang pro Sunbae saya gak nerusin nontonnya (the ending sucks, they said).

Looking at some beautifully taken and instagrammable photos on my feed by several people, I refrain myself from posting photos because for me, mine was not share-able enough.

Jaman kuliah dulu yang paling parah, saya pernah nggak ada masalah sama orang tapi jadi ikutan sebel karena kata temen saya si orang itu nyebelin banget.

Yes, it was that bad.

The same thing also happened in the office. Waktu dua orang teman saya resign di bulan yang sama, I think a lot about resigning. Dua teman saya itu adalah orang-orang yang rame banget di kantor, dan saya nggak yakin kalau saya bisa tetap ada di kantor tanpa mereka (because that means bigger responsibility).

Another thing is that resigning is such a hot topic in the office. We get along well, but we didn't get along so much with the workload. Saya tau ada saatnya orang-orang yang sudah jadi tim yang asik selama hampir setahun ini akan resign dan jalan masing-masing. Saya sendiri, awalnya, punya target ini itu soal kerja dan kuliah dan mungkin having a business to make my dream of having a home office came true. Tapi setelah dengar target resign orang-orang, yang saya pikirkan adalah kapan saya akan resign karena saya nggak mau merasa ditinggal sama orang-orang yang menyenangkan ini.

Hal lainnya adalah, saya jadi ikutan sebel, ikutan nggak suka sama seseorang cuma karena teman saya nggak suka sama orang itu. Padahal, saya nggak merasa ada masalah sama orang itu. I do think she has her own judgement and priority, things we don't see on the surfaces.

Overtime, I realize, that I might not living my life to the fullest because of that. Gampaaaaang banget kepengaruh sama orang lain dan menjadikan standar bagusnya orang lain jadi semacam patokan untuk bagusnya saya. Di saat yang sama, teman-teman yang ada di sekeliling saya adalah orang yang emang artistik, a very good observer who always have good stories to tell, dan yang emang oke aja gitu (menurut saya). Jadi after being an easy prey to be influenced (even when people didn't mean to) kemudian saya jadi insecure. Do I really deserve to be friend with them, mereka tuh oke banget, pasti orang ngeliatnya gue si penggembira doang.

Dari situ saya sadar, I can't let myself defined by others. Bukannya saya nggak terima dinilai orang, tapi jangan sampai saya menilai diri saya sendiri berdasarkan standar yang saya lihat di orang lain. Bukannya orang lain nggak boleh punya pendapat, tapi saya harus menghargai pendapat saya sendiri tentang sesuatu.

Kenyataannya, in Goodreads, I rate an average book as a 5 stars and it was my favorite book of all time, on the other hand, I rate a 4-point-something book a 1 star because it wasn't my kind of story.

After a short chat with a friend, saya inget saya nonton Cheese in the Trap karena suka sama ceritanya, sama karakternya, sama baju-bajunya Hong Seol, sama EunTaek dan Bora and what gets me the most is the friendship between Baek In Ho and Hong Seol (was he a bad guy? The story is kind of complicated), not so much the love story between the main lead (though I enjoyed that too, but more on a neutral ground).

The thing about having a social media is to share what I need to share, bukan yang bagus atau yang pamer atau yang pretentious. And so does other people, yang beda adalah definisi what they need to share-nya. I can define it myself and I don't need to be defined or defining other people.

Dan yang terakhir, saya punya mimpi saya sendiri, punya level toleransi sendiri, punya cara sendiri untuk menghadapi orang lain. Kalau yang diomongin orang lain adalah kapan mereka mau resign karena nggak tahan dengan kondisi kantor, yang saya harus pikirkan adalah gimana caranya to squeeze out all the lesson before moving on to the next stage, whether going to graduate school or managing my own thing. Kalau ada seseorang yang jadi common enemy, bukan berarti saya juga harus ikutan. I seriously need to see good in people. I need to save myself from hating too much and that seriously worth it.

Ngebahas ini, saya jadi inget ada yang pernah bilang kalau kita harusnya banyak menghabiskan waktu sama orang-orang yang vibes-nya positif. Yang optimis, yang punya banyak ide, or simply those who have good thoughts. Sama orang-orang yang menghargai pendapat orang lain dan firmly stand on their own opinion. Orang-orang yang bisa bikin saya less criticizing myself about having different preference with others and be happy, confident, and comfortable of my own opinion.

Cheers for a more optimistic, worry free, less overthinking life ahead :)

Disclaimer : The HASHTAG NAIKCOMLINE series does not decide what to do or not to do on the Commuter Line. I only share my experience and explain it from my perspective. Thank you :).

Berdiri itu pegel is a common knowledge. Duduk juga pegel sih, coba aja tanya sama orang yang biasa mudik 40 jam ke Jawa Tengah (misalnya macet) atau Jawa Timur.

Tapi berdiri kayaknya lebih pegel sih. Apalagi kalo berdiri di kereta sambil ngeliatin orang-orang yang duduk pada tidur. No offense, tapi yaaa pengen juga sih kadang-kadang bisa duduk dan bobo di kereta. Saya sih mikirnya, sebagai anak (?) umur 20-an yang naik gerbong wanita, kepengen duduk di peak hour nya comline aja udah nggak usah lah. Masih banyak orang butuh; we'll never know what people has endure in their working hour, kan?

Dulu, waktu belum naik comline, saya sering denger cerita orang-orang yang bawa kursi lipat biar bisa duduk di kereta. At that time, the idea seems to be sooo brilliant. Bayangkan, pinter banget gak sih kita bisa duduk di kereta penuh. Yuhuu, I'm so buying a folding chair! Kayanya waktu itu sempet mikir gitu juga.

Kenyataannya, duduk di kereta selain di kursi yang disediakan (baik ngemper depan pintu yang nggak kebuka, di pojok-pojok, dan di kursi lipat di pojook-pojok deket pintu yang nggak kebuka) itu sebetulnya nggak boleh di kereta.

Ah masa sih? Seriusaaan...

Tuh. Sama kok kayak di bus/MRT Singapur, nggak boleh makan minum juga sebenernya. (Padahal suka bandel bawa otak otak) (source)

Duduk di selain tempat duduk sebetulnya boros tempat. Ruang yang dibutuhkan satu orang berdiri yang cuma 40 x 60 cm* berubah menjadi 60 x 60 cm* kalau orang itu duduk. Kalo dihitung cuma satu orang sih nggak signifikan memang, tapi misalnya pintu kereta ada 4, plus pojok-pojok buntu dekat lokomotif. 10 orang duduk bisa memberi tempat untuk 15 orang berdiri. Lumayan, kan?

Satu lagi kerugian yang dialami orang yang berdiri kalau ada orang duduk adalah berdiri makin susah. Jadi kan orang-orang yang duduk itu pada duduk di pojok kereta yang deket lokomotif. Sementara tempat itu juga deket sama bagian pintu yang pegangannya letaknya cukup tinggi dan nggak terlalu banyak. Bagian kereta yang buntu karena deket pintu lokomotif adalah tempat yang bisa diandalkan untuk nyender supaya orang-orang yang berdiri ini punya pegangan.

Dengan adanya orang duduk, posisi si orang berdiri jadi kegeser 60 cm dari senderan itu (ya kan duduknya sambil nyender, jadi diitungnya yang 60 cm). Akhirnya orang yang berdiri ini harus mengulurkan tangan biar bisa tetep pegangan ke dinding itu. Percaya deh, itu lebih susah dan lebih gampang kerasa sakit dan pegel, apalagi kalo kondisi keretanya lagi penuh dan kedorong-dorong orang jadi sesuatu yang sangat lumrah.

Berdiri itu pegel is a common knowledge. Why don't we make it easier for other people who ignore their desire to sit on the floor by quit sitting in the train, unless it's on the seat. A win-win solution, right?

See you on the next HASHTAG NAIKCOMLINE! :)

sumber :
*http://www.pu.go.id/uploads/services/infopublik20120329160823.pdf. diakses 16/08/2014

Katanya nagging itu sayang. Kata siapaaaa? Katanya...

The older the person gets, I think the more difficult it is to understand his/her mind in couples of try. Especially when we were too attached and start to, unconscioulsy, taking them for granted.

Meet my grandfather, a person I called ompung my whole life, who consistently resisting to go to Jakarta everytime his children asked him to visit. The one who can't stay for more than an hour in a family visit (we count it last lebaran. It's rude, I know...), and who asked when we leave as soon as we are arrived.

We can't get too detail with him; at the specific time, he will start to ask why we haven't leave or arrived. It gets annoyying, I should agree. He will making phonecalls when we are not arrived on time. Or when we won't leave, he will asked why, even if it's a trivial reason like waiting to get into the bathroom, or finishing lunch.

Yesterday, my aunt's family left to went to other city at noon. My grandfather asked my father to call her to asked whether she has arrived at around 7 pm, and she said thay she was still on her way. It was supposed to be a 2 hour drive from my grandparent's house, but she arrived at 9 pm; 7 hours after she departed.

At dinner, he seems to be a bit sad. While taking his food, he asked to my parents whether my aunt has taken some food with her to be eaten on the way. He also said that he was about to sent my aunt right after we finished breakfast because for him, it will be much easier to handle the road when it's still daytime, rather than nighttime when it's already dark.

He was worried, in such a roundabout way.

I will keep this one for the day when my parents start to nag me around. It was a sign of worry and love, in such a roundabout way.

Noted!

1. Facebook status is public by default

By that I mean that we don't choose what to see or what not to show (except you are okay to trouble yourself to change your privacy setting or mute some annoying people as the feature is currently available). But I think I am also 'kepo' by default so I don't really use the feature and enjoying people's life story via facebook. That makes me aware that I don't really want people to know about my life in detail and this is the very basic reason of why I don't update my facebook status at all. 

2. Facebook status is real time and in my opinion, it's supposed to be short 

Eventhough facebook status is supposed to be an answer to the question 'what's on your mind?', and in that manner I can be as elaborate as possible, most people only tell how he was at that time (like, how annoying a person who snore beside me on my flight to HK! and not what kind of person the snoring person is, why do I have to go to HK, or with whom I went to HK) and it bring us to the third reason that 

3. I can't elaborate things to everyone via facebook status 

And the facebook status can not reveal my thinking process and my knowledge as a whole and some people, while just being naturally curious or honestly caring, needs explanation.
4. Because people, and that include myself, tends to make conclusion
For me, the point is, how do I arrive to that conclusion. Do I read and concluding real time and keep it for myself? Do I read and think and observe then concluding? Or do I read, concluding real time, listening to someone having the same conclusion, and end up labeling the person whose status I read? 

5. And from the fourth point, I came to a conclusion (see I've been through four parts here, just saying) that facebook status is a place where misunderstanding is inevitable. 

I know one case when a renown ustadz make a series of tweet about how useless is having girl/boyfriend and my friend, who happens to follow the account and currently having boyfriend said that the ustadz is exaggerating and she doesn't do things to that extent with her boyfriend. In my point of view, the whole thing about having girl/boyfriend is not as simple as whether it's allowed or not, it is a matter of what do you believe and what do you understand from your belief. The ustadz may have elaborate it on the former tweet on why it's not supposed to be done based on his belief but my friend might be too lazy to stalk the timeline. Maybe the ustadz was using some confusing words that it is a bother even just to read or maybe my friend was involved in some conversation where people said that they don't agree to the tweets. Anything can happen when we can't explain ourselves, and mostly it's misunderstanding. 

6. It's true that I don't have to explain myself, but when I need to be heard, when I am about to transfer my knowledge, then people need to know it as a whole, not as parts. 

And it's only fair that way. To myself, and to people who read. 

7. At the end, I think the question has change from whether to update or not to update my facebook status with such a sensitive statement, to whether it is the right platform to do such things. 

After reviewing the six number above, I answer myself that it might not be the rightest platform for me (note that all of my reason is completely subjective, not generally applicable, but definitely one of a million way of answering the question on update or not updating your facebook status) because I have a need to make people understand about me and my mind. That way, it is easier to be heard.